3 Goodnights

It's been awhile since I've written, partially because I've just been busy or had my mind elsewhere, but partly because I've ignored the urge to do so.  Sometimes I just don't know what, how much, or when to share.  So here's a short thought for you today.  A little bit of sad, but a whole lot of love.

Every night, I tuck my children in.  Even if Corey has been up 217 times, I have to tuck him in before I can settle into my own dreams.  Even if I snuggled Makayla for "just one more minute," I have to hold my hands out over her and ask God's protection over her thoughts as she sleeps.

Since Makayla was a tiny baby, I got into the habit of asking God to station His angels around her bed as she sleeps.  I've continued doing so for each of my children.  It's such a vulnerable time, both physically and mentally.  It's also a very receptive time when the heart and mind are quiet and open.  I pray that God would watch over my children and impress His wisdom upon them.  I pray they would know Him even now and live out their lives within His will.

After Annabelle passed, I ran into a bit of a conundrum at tuck-in and prayer time.  She no longer needs God's protection since she is in His very presence.  But as I leave Corey's room each night, I pass her picture, blow her a kiss, and ask that I can be a good Mama to her memory, because that I have the privilege of carrying forever.  Sometimes I cry, and sometimes I smile...but every night I know she's tucked in too.

Sweet dreams, dear Annabelle